Finders Killers, it’s Friday NEWS (2025-09-13)
- Broadcast Date: 2025-09-13
- YouTube Archive: Finders Killers, it’s Friday NEWS (ID:
F1_w2rz1nzU) - Approx length: 3:19:43
- Ingest run:
tools/runs/F1_w2rz1nzU/
Overview
Case Blackwell hosts a Friday edition of Barely Informed News covering the arrest of Tyler James Robinson for the Charlie Kirk shooting, with Jevrything co-anchoring and revealing a snake-throat vocal implant. Guy Redacted fails to produce a viable Charlie Brown conspiracy, declaring all children’s media alien indoctrination. The Encircled segment pits a carrot-bodied Daniel LaRusso against snake karate practitioners in a lethal fire-trap debate. A protest-driven news rundown covers WWE’s Saudi WrestleMania, Nepal’s ChatGPT-selected leader, and competitive eating. Hate Sock abuses Scrum and Kendall before DJ C4 produces an explicit ‘I Have Sex’ track with Trent and Chris, ending with a raid on Static Slater.
Segment rundown
| Start | End | Segment | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| 00:00 | 11:51 | News: Cold Open & Music with Jevrything | Jevrything and Darfus perform musical cold open; Case discusses green screen couch and upcoming wall entry on 9-19. |
| 11:51 | 50:01 | News: Charlie Kirk Killing Arrest | Case and Jevrything cover arrest of Tyler James Robinson for Charlie Kirk shooting; discuss governor’s reaction, soaking memes, and political fallout. |
| 51:20 | 01:04:40 | News: Guy Redacted: Charlie Brown Conspiracies | Guy Redacted attempts conspiracy deep-dive on Charlie Brown; abandons two-hour video, watches AI-generated ‘real kids’ clip, concludes Peanuts is alien indoctrination. |
| 01:04:40 | 01:39:01 | Encircled: Encircled: Daniel LaRusso vs. Cobras | Daniel LaRusso (carrot-bodied) debates snake karate practitioners; claims snakes can’t kick/chop/knee; eliminates multiple opponents via fire trap. |
| 01:39:01 | 02:00:03 | News: News Rundown: WWE Saudi Arabia, Nepal ChatGPT, Hassan, Ludwig | Scrum reads news under protest: WrestleMania 2027 in Riyadh, Nepal youth use ChatGPT to pick interim PM, Hassan Abiyah clip resurfaced, Ludwig MrBeast milk tasting, Sega dev kits, grandma Pokemon game, neo-nazi implosion, Joey Chestnut poutine record. |
| 02:00:03 | 02:22:35 | News: Hate Sock & Kendall Focus Group | Hate Sock insults Scrum; Kendall appears for video focus group; Hate Sock reluctantly watches Kendall’s Universal Studios fit-check montage. |
| 02:22:35 | 03:19:43 | DJ C4: DJ C4: ‘I Have Sex’ Song Production | DJ C4 writes and records ‘I Have Sex’ with Trent (teenager persona) and Chris (responsible sex advice); ghost writer assists; raid Static Slater. |
Characters
- Case Blackwell (speaking) — Anchors Friday broadcast; coordinates segments; mentions green couch and 9-19 wall entry.
- Jevrything (speaking) — correspondent. Musical cold open; co-hosts Charlie Kirk coverage; reveals 30% snake throat implant.
- Pepito (speaking) — executive producer. Fixes technical switching for Encircled segment; claims sun poisoning.
- Guy Redacted (speaking) — correspondent. Hosts conspiracy segment; fails to find viable Charlie Brown theory; declares all children’s media unsafe.
- Daniel LaRusso (speaking) — debate analyst. Carrot-bodied karate master defeats snake opponents in Encircled via fire trap.
- Scrum (speaking) — correspondent. Reads news rundown under protest; declares words pointless; quits mid-segment.
- Hate Sock (speaking) — correspondent. Insults Scrum and Kendall; participates in focus group; admits Kendall’s video was enjoyable.
- Kendelle (speaking) — in-studio contributor. Walks through studio for video focus group; seeks feedback on Universal Studios montage.
- DJ C4 (speaking) — correspondent. Produces ‘I Have Sex’ track; coordinates ghost writer, Trent, and Chris; mixes vocals heavily.
- Trent (speaking) — guest. Performs teenage sex-brag verses; claims to have been having sex moments before recording.
- Chris (speaking) — guest. Delivers responsible sex education verse; corrects ‘her ego’ to ‘that ego’ on second take.
Storyline updates
- Beyblade Tournament: Case confirms Beyblade tournament / wall entry scheduled for next Friday 9-19 (one week from broadcast).
- Join the Wall: Case references entering the wall on 9-19; Jolt Cola untouched in wall for months.
Lore notes
- 16:16 Jevrything: Has 30% snake throat implant installed to improve vocals.
- 10:27 Case Blackwell: Green couch acquired for green screen production; no content made on it yet.
- 10:48 Case Blackwell: Beyblade tournament and wall entry scheduled for 2025-09-19.
- 01:05:13 Pepito: Claims sun poisoning but operates switcher for Encircled segment.
- 02:18:02 Kendelle: Produces OOTD/fit-check videos; friends are Universal Studios performers (street sweep dancers, NY cop bit, Snowball puppeteer).
Transcript
Full timestamped transcript: