Grunchmas 2024 (2024-12-23)
- Broadcast Date: 2024-12-23
- YouTube Archive: Grunchmas 2024 (ID:
eVZvbJFawhA) - Approx length: 2:27:34
- Ingest run:
tools/runs/eVZvbJFawhA/
Overview
The Grunchmas 2024 special sees anchor Case Blackwell embody the horny green ‘Grunch’ for a week-long annual broadcast event, processing a record subscriber haul with Hype Train before adjudicating the community-submitted ‘Fucks List’ of internet personalities and fictional characters. The broadcast features a surprise Munch & Crum debate on Crum’s sexual activity, a How To with Jeb gift-wrapping tutorial, and concludes with Grunch fulfilling Kendelle’s wish to turn pink and sing ‘Popular’ from Wicked before raiding out.
Segment rundown
| Start | End | Segment | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| 00:08 | 07:16 | News: Station Cold-Open: Pepito Sign-On | Pepito delivers the official Grunchmas sign-on from the control room, identifying as the dog producer and president of the ‘one who flocks every crust man.‘ |
| 07:16 | 09:26 | News: Grunchmas Introduction | Case Blackwell debuts as The Grunch — a horny green Grinch variant — explaining his annual emergence from an amniotic sack for a week-long procreative orgy. |
| 09:26 | 23:45 | Hype Train: Hype Train Summoning & Subscriber Roll | Grunch summons Hype Train to the scrying cave; Hype Train hits level 10 hype with a Christmas trap beat freestyle while processing a massive sub influx including 5 community subs from Cycorp and 300 bits from S.K.O.A.M.Y.R. |
| 24:05 | 24:55 | Munch & Crum: Munch Interrupts Grunchmas | Munch briefly hijacks the broadcast claiming a spiritual retreat in Jacksonville, Florida, declares ‘Mary fucks miss,’ and sings a truncated ‘O Holy Night’ before departing. |
| 25:17 | 02:14:57 | News: The Fucks List Adjudication | Grunch works through the community Discord submissions deciding who ‘fucks’ — covering internet personalities, fictional characters, and public figures with absurdist rationale — punctuated by beat changes and musical interludes. |
| 01:06:14 | 01:16:59 | Munch & Crum: Grunch vs Crum Debate: Does Crum Fuck? | Crum appears with glowing radioactive hair; Grunch argues affirmatively while Crum rhetorically withholds, culminating in Crum revealing a daily scheduled marital intimacy regimen managed via locked chore calendar. |
| 01:35:01 | 01:48:56 | How To with Jeb: How To with Jeb: Gift Wrapping Tutorial | Jeb Nogget summoned to scrying cave; learns to wrap a candle for a Starbucks barista while confirming his father is purely a wooden construct with no human remains. |
| 02:13:23 | 02:14:57 | News: Fucks List Speed Round | Grunch rapid-fires through remaining entries in rhyming cadence over struggling beats, covering dozens of names in a final sprint to close the list. |
| 02:15:27 | 02:22:25 | News: Kendall’s Grunk-Miss Wish: Popular (Pink Grunch) | Grunch saturates himself pink to fulfill Kendelle’s second wish, performing ‘Popular’ from Wicked with Kendelle briefly appearing on camera. |
| 02:22:25 | 02:27:34 | News: Raid & Sign-Off | Grunch thanks subscribers, announces return to regular BIN scheduling, and raids Miss Fire O3 while overlooking the uninviting Whoville orgy from his mountaintop cave. |
Characters
- Pepito (speaking) — executive producer. Delivers the Grunchmas cold-open sign-on from the control room as the dog producer.
- Case Blackwell (speaking) — anchor. Hosts the Grunchmas special as The Grunch, a horny green Grinch variant who adjudicates the annual Fucks List.
- Hype Train (speaking) — recurring. Summoned to the scrying cave; hits level 10 hype with a Christmas trap freestyle while processing record subscriber numbers.
- Munch (Ralph Munchcut) (speaking) — recurring. Briefly interrupts claiming a Jacksonville spiritual retreat, sings ‘O Holy Night,’ and departs.
- Crum (Leonard Crum) (speaking) — recurring. Debates Grunch on whether Crum fucks, reveals glowing radioactive hair and a daily scheduled marital intimacy regimen.
- Jeb Nogget (speaking) — recurring. Summoned for a gift-wrapping tutorial; confirms his father is purely a wooden construct and gifts a candle to a Starbucks barista.
- Kendelle (speaking) — in-studio contributor. Provides Grunk-miss wishes (Define Gravity, Popular) and appears briefly during the pink Grunch finale.
Storyline updates
- Grunchmas: Grunchmas 2024 Fucks List adjudication; Grunch vs Crum “does Crum fuck?” debate; Kendelle wish turns Grunch pink for Popular.
Lore notes
- 07:58 The Grunch emerges annually from an amniotic sack as an amoeba, rapidly growing to full size and immediately entering a procreative state; he self-clones and considers himself immortal despite dying yearly.
- 13:43 The Grunch’s heart is a genital that grows six sizes during the season.
- 14:28 The Grunch’s physical form shrank slightly this year, reducing operating room in the Grunchmas cave.
- 01:03:37 Munch claims a months-long spiritual retreat in Jacksonville, Florida, where he concluded he was ‘right’ all along.
- 01:07:16 Crum now possesses a full head of glowing radioactive hair, a departure from his canonical bald pate.
- 01:15:58 Crum and his wife Belulia maintain a locked chore calendar that schedules daily sexual activity, using water-based lubricant when needed.
- 01:39:36 Jeb’s father is confirmed as entirely wooden with no human tissue remaining, trapped in a board.
- 01:45:33 Jeb regularly gifts candles to a specific Starbucks barista (Jessica) who works a Tuesdays/Thursdays off schedule he finds suspicious.
Transcript
Full timestamped transcript: